Antarctica Ice Berg Breakoff Spells Climate Change For California

by on 12/07/17 at 10:36 am

According to experts on the scene the massive crack in the ice shelf began in May.

According to experts on the scene the massive crack in the ice shelf began in May.

Scenes like this might be common in Los Angeles next summer.

Scenes like this might be common in Los Angeles next summer.

Los Angeles, CA – (SatireWorld.com)

A massive iceberg which broke off from Antarctica’s Larsen Shelf today could spell disaster for Los Angeles if it floats too far north from the Antarctic continent.

In order to track the estimated 1,270-square-mile iceberg, the Natural Environment Research College of Sweden gave a grant of $2 million dollars to track the largest iceberg ever recorded as it trekked northward. The funds will be used to help predict the path of the giant iceberg, which broke off Antarctica’s Pine Island Glacier on July 12th.

According to BBC News, Professor Lars Svenson explained that the iceberg began floating away from the glacier sometime in the last couple days. Earlier, during Antarctica’s winter, the floe remained affixed to the larger part, likely due to sea ice and cold winter temperatures. Today, it broke apart with a noise so loud it could be heard in parts of southern Chile.

“It often takes a while for icebergs from this area to get out of Pine Island Bay but once they do that they can either go eastwards along the coast or they can circle out into the main part of the Southern Ocean,” Svenson told BBC.

As the LA Times points out, news of the iceberg drifting has sparked a flurry of size comparison from the entirety of the state of Oregon to eight times the area of California Congresswoman Maxine Waters ass.

The iceberg is the first of its size to break off from the island since 2001. While researchers do not expect the iceberg to cause any environmental issues when it melts, the massive piece of ice could interfere with Los Angeles commerce as millions will use the ice to cool drinks, provide free air conditioning, and as a place to ski during summer months.

The downside is, the giant iceberg will cause the ocean waters to drop in temperature, thwarting surfers from enjoying the sport that made California famous.

Initial predictions hold that the iceberg will follow the Antarctic Coastal Current toward the Ross Sea before it eventually reaches the Southern Ocean where the Australian currents will push it northward, the research grant states. Scientists will use computer generated algorithms to forecast where the iceberg will float over the next six months, the period of time covered by the grant. The iceberg’s lifetime is expected to span roughly 7 years. Most feel with the Australian water currents as they are, the massive berg will collide with the Port of Los Angeles sometime next summer.

The California Senate is already drawing up plans to offer amnesty to all Penguins and to set up social services to allow them free food, shelter, and Obamacare once they arrive in Los Angeles.

Snow tire and tire chain sales are expected to be brisk says Ira Cohen, owner of several tire discount stores.



2 Responses to “Antarctica Ice Berg Breakoff Spells Climate Change For California”

  1. O'Leg Pee

    Jul 12th, 2017

    Ahem. This one could end up in a court over alleged ownership:

    “A firm in Abu Dhabi has floated plans to tow icebergs from Antarctica to the United Arab Emirates to solve the country’s fresh water shortage. An iceberg holding 20bn gallons of fresh water could meet the needs of a million people for five years, but first it would have to be hauled across 10,000km of open ocean to the coast of Fujairah, a feat that could take a year.”

    https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2017/may/05/could-towing-icebergs-to-hot-places-solve-the-worlds-water-shortage

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