More Kavanaugh Accusations Revealed

by on 28/09/18 at 1:04 pm

Democratic operative Leslie Woods enters a full meltdown after watching Brett Kavanaugh  politically eviscerate  Senate Democrats during the Thursday hearing.

Democratic operative Leslie Woods, age 42, enters a full meltdown after watching Brett Kavanaugh politically eviscerate Senate Democrats during the Thursday hearing.

Washington, DC – (

After the initial three allegations were revealed over a few weeks, a startling number of allegations against Supreme Court Nominee Brett Kavanaugh were revealed just today.  Those allegations include:

  • A woman says that four year old Brett said that her face looked like doo doo.
  • Another women has accused Kavanaugh of putting a tack on her chair in fifth grade
  • A man has accused the nominee of body shaming by calling him “Fatso” when they were eight and feels that this scarred him for life.
  • A woman said that a young Brett popped her bra strap when they were thirteen while in line in a junior high school cafeteria.  While she admits that five boys were clustered behind her and they all laughed and she never actually saw Kavanaugh pop her bra strap, she is “absolutely sure” that it was him.
  • A World War II veteran says that he saw a uniformed Kavanaugh frag his own men on Omaha beach decades before he was actually born.
  • A man in California says that Kavanaugh came to a rolling stop at a stop sign (never fully stopping) fifteen years ago and that he obviously has no regards to traffic laws.  The man says that Kavanaugh was driving a 57 Chevy and had an Afro with a pick in his hair and looked like he was pretending to be black.
  • A former neighbor said that a young Brett never said “thank you” after receiving Halloween candy and is obviously ungrateful.
  • A woman said that he said “yes sir” to her by mistake.
  • A man said that Kavanaugh did not attend his birthday party when they were in the third grade, even though he had been given an invitation.
  • A woman who claims to have been in the same third grade class said that the Valentine card he gave her depicted PePe LePew, the Looney Tunes skunk character, implying the she smelled bad.
  • A second grade classmate said that she was sexually harassed when Brett sang “I see London, I see France, I see Sophie’s underpants.”
  • A mother said that, while watching a group of children playing a game of T-Ball in a park, Kavanaugh asked what the score was and which team was ahead.  She felt that this gave the children unreal expectations and tried to teach that some children were losers (when all should feel victorious and scores should not be kept).
  • A flat chested girl in Kavanaugh’s high school said that a teenage Brett never stared at her chest, shaming her and making her feel less a woman.
  • A man said that he felt embarrassed when a twelve year old Kavanaugh giggled when the man experienced flatulence and farted loudly.
  • A woman claimed that an eighteen month old Kavanaugh filled an extraordinary amount of diapers, causing her to have to change him and see him naked and wipe his genitals clean, when she babysat him for his parents one night.

More accusations are expected from Democrats tomorrow.  Film at eleven.

When he read this list of today’s allegations against his nominee, President Trump was heard to say “do you believe this shit?  Is there a boy in America that didn’t do just about every one of these things (except for that imaginary fragging of the troops before he was ever born and the guy who thought he was black)?”

In a related story Hanoi Jane Fonda is considering blaming Kavanaugh for being the one sitting on the anti-aircraft gun in North Vietnam.


4 Responses to “More Kavanaugh Accusations Revealed”

  1. Jalapenoman

    Oct 4th, 2018

    So the Democrats got the investigation that they wanted into Kavanaugh. The is was done by the FBI (which they control), which is run by the Justice Department (which they control). Their own investigation found nothing concrete or credible against the man. Now the Feinsteins of the world are calling their own investigation a sham and threatening to block the appointment? Can someone please explain facts to these brain dead morons!

  2. Bargis

    Oct 5th, 2018

    They have revealed themselves at their worst! These morons are NOT the Democratic party of old……..Remember Tip O’Neal and Ronald Reagan getting things done with a laugh and a smile but all the while having true respect for both sides.
    Now, look what we have Clintons, Menedez, Whitehouse, Pelosi, Feinstein,Schumer the Tumor, Booker and a whole host of power hungry clowns.

  3. Philbert of Macadamia

    Oct 5th, 2018

    Sen. Whitehouse (D-RI) gets a woodie looking at a Brillo pad!

  4. O’Leg P

    Oct 5th, 2018

    Mrs Kavanaugh looks like she’s swallowed battery acid. Expect she knows most of the unvarnished truth.

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