Rosie O’Donnell Admits What She Did With Her Tuba “This One Time at Band Camp”

by on 15/10/18 at 11:53 am

Good thing she gave up the piano at age 10.

Good thing she gave up the piano at age 10.

Fionna, NY – (

Former high school band member and tuba player Rosie O’Donnell admitted in casual conversation to others that she had a “sexual encounter” with her musical instrument while they were watching the 1999 teen comedy move “American Pie.”  In the movie, character Michelle says that “this one time, at band camp, I stuck a flute in my pussy.”

Rosie snarkily laughed after the scene and turned and said to others watching the movie  “I did that with my tuba at band camp, at home, in the band room, on the school bus, and anywhere I had a chance and where people would pay to watch!”  When one person incredulously asked “you mean the mouth piece, right?”, O’Donnell smiled and said “no, I mean the whole thing.  That’s why they called me cavern cunt even in high school.”

“I’d have never felt a flute, unless maybe you put it in sideways… along with the flute player!”

“I also learned how to shove the mouthpiece in my ass and fart Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star, but it was kind of hard to reach behind me and push on the right buttons.”

“I had considered learning how to play the cello and joining the orchestra, but the Tuba just had this huge end and opening and that seemed so familiar to me!”

O’Donnell, a self-admitted militant lesbian, also said that “I used this one girl’s flute to pop the cherry of every girl in my cabin, but since I am gay and a democrat, you can’t persecute me for it because it wouldn’t be politically correct…. besides, the statute of limitations is long over on that one, even if Christine Blasey Ford suddenly comes up with suppressed memories about what happened!”

Rosie, who has been “married” to two different women is supposedly “engaged” to victim number three.

2 Responses to “Rosie O’Donnell Admits What She Did With Her Tuba “This One Time at Band Camp””

  1. Philbert of Macadamia

    Oct 15th, 2018

    Rosie uses special order sewer cover size Depends!

  2. Bargis

    Oct 16th, 2018

    Aha!!!! So this is where the phrase ‘ I’m so Horny’ comes from!

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