DNC Chairman Sends a Generic Concession Speech Outline to Losing Democratic Candidates

by on 19/11/18 at 7:57 am

This photo might help when blame needs a father.

This photo might help when blame needs a father.

Washington DC- (satireworld.com)

The current Democratic National Committee (DNC) Chairman Tom Perez has sent a generic concession speech outline to be used by all losing liberal Democratic candidates in the 2018 mid-term elections. This email formulates how a Democratic candidate can admit losing without really, ever conceding defeat!

The tactics are as follows:

  • We congratulate our Republican opponent, as my supporters tell me that my campaign seems to be on the deficit side of the ballot count but are hopefully optimistic that additional ballots in our favor will be forthcoming.
  • We will stop actively campaigning but notice that the winning Republican candidate is a Racist, a Homophobe (and a Transphobe), Xenophobic, Misogynistic (unless a woman), and Islamophobic.
  • We have found that my Republican opponent still beats his or her spouse, has athlete’s foot, halitosis and possibly STDs.
  • We expect additional stuffed ballot boxes in our favor, voting machine errors, illegal aliens voting, and lost Republican candidate ballots to swing the tight election in our favor or to a runoff election.
  • Mainstreet Media (MSM) Fake News from CNN, MSNBC, ABC, and the New York Times etal is still on our side.
  • We have hired ANTIFA, Black Lives Matter (BLM) and Black Panther Party thugs to aid the vote counting process.
  • We have hired former SOS Hillary Clinton and Rep. Nancy Pelosi’s (D-CA) law firms to file frivolous law suits about recounts that will drag out the vote certification process, being performed by state officials, forever.
  • We do these things to make sure that the integrity of the US voting process is maintained.

Comments and additions to this email should be provided to the DNC.

Notes: The pronoun “we” is to be replaced by the losing Democratic candidates name.



One Response to “DNC Chairman Sends a Generic Concession Speech Outline to Losing Democratic Candidates”

  1. Bargis

    Nov 19th, 2018

    nothing sticks to Teflon liberals it seems

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