Honduras Caravan Members Sue Trump Administration Because “We Weren’t Allowed to Participate in the Black Friday Sales”

by on 24/11/18 at 8:27 am

Juan Gonzalez  shows his grief over missing out on online sale during Black Friday's  consumer vent.  A  Popeil Taco Toaster and a chance to win a 50 inch color TV . 'This was an event-of-a-lifetime,' says Juan.

Juan Gonzalez shows his grief over missing out on an online sale during Black Friday’s consumer events. A Popeil Taco Toaster and a chance to win a 50 inch color TV . ‘This was an event-of-a-lifetime,’ says Juan.


Tijuana, Mexico – (satireworld.com)

The Honduras Caravan members have sued the President and the Trump Administration because their being refused an illegal entry into the United States prevented them from being able to participate in the 2018 Black Friday sales.  They were also limited in buying at Small Business Saturday sales (though they could buy online on Cyber Monday from those retailers who would ship internationally to a mob without a real address).

Juan Antonio Salazar Lopez de Castillo, a mob member known among others as El Gordo, said through an interpreter that “I did not have a change to buy any five dollar Barbie Dolls or three dollar blue rays or two dollar tool boxes.  My wife and my children will be deprived of their opportunity for the American Capitalist celebrations of Black Friday and camping out overnight on a Best Buy sidewalk and fighting for ninety-nine dollar flat screen TV sets, and making other customers do face plants when they dive for the six dollar teddy bear that you snagged first.  This is all a basic right of human existence and one of our unalienable rights from your Bill of Rights… life, liberty, and the pursuit of cheap holiday sales.”

“The discrimination by the American Conservatives has belittled my children and I and have lessened our faith in the goodness of those who have so much to share with others.”

A second interpreter who was secretly listening in claimed that El Gordo really didn’t say any this, but actually only said “Trump is a puto and I want to see some American blondes with big titties on California beaches and get all of my free stuff from the idiots who just want to buy my vote.”

When asked his opinion on denying these self proclaimed refugees for freedom from Black Friday, President Trump said that “Making America Great Again includes only allowing the hard working labor force of the United States to have the privilege of cheap prices on the Thanksgiving weekend sales.  It does not include allowing freeloading future democrats the right to take these things away from our citizens.”



2 Responses to “Honduras Caravan Members Sue Trump Administration Because “We Weren’t Allowed to Participate in the Black Friday Sales””

  1. Bargis

    Nov 24th, 2018

    brings a tear to my eyes….A heart-wrenching story from Jman. It should be a Christmas classic.

  2. Philbert of Macadamia

    Nov 24th, 2018

    The NAACP and the ACLU are suing Honduras Caravan members for racism, e.g. using the slur term “Black Friday!”

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