Authorities Report Paris Hilton Dead. Drugs Blamed!

by on 01/04/11 at 4:33 am

Hilton didn't understand all the fuss and asked her room mate to check her pulse just in case. She also didn't understand what an April Fool's joke was either.

Paris, France-(

Police and investigators are in a quandary after reports trickled in that the Paris Hilton is dead due to drug use. Fans flocked to the scene as health officials and police investigators combed the area for clues and evidence.

Paris Hilton’s manager, Pierre Crapeeli noted that everything was fine last night until the local drug lords showed up and the Hilton emptied of patrons who were abhorred at the flagrant drug use going on the lobby. Says Crapeeli…”We went from 99% occupancy down to zero in about 45 minutes. We are dead, dead, dead!”

Others were troubled by the news and actually thought the story was another hoax, but deeper evaluation proved it was really an April Fools Joke from who has pulled the public’s leg for a long time.

Readers might want to check to see if someone placed a ‘kick me’ sign on your back today.

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