by Buckwheatsbutt on 16/09/11 at 1:50 pmParis, France – (SatireWorld)
French politicians recently approved a measure that would ban massive buttocks smelling ceremonies usually held on Friday afternoons in various public parts of the French capitol. According to well placed sources, the event was discouraged at first when children as young as five-year olds were noticed walking among the participants. Some injuries were reported and prompted the speedy crackdown. (no pun intended)Repeated warnngs were ignored and finally, with a 100% approving vote, the measure was brought up in a binding resolution, than passed as French law.
Ali Kupta, a spokesman for the French Alliance Of Bum Sniffers, issued a fomal complaint with the French Parliment, but so far his formal petition has been ignored and the ban is staying in place. Muslim citizens claim the law is discriminatory and aimed primarily at them. Some religious leaders have offered to compromise and hold their events out of the public eye, but a public backlash has forced the ban to cover to all public areas of the country.
The F.A.B.S touts membership roles of about 3.4 million middle eastern men who reside in France under a formal work visa arrangement with Syria, Egypt, and Iran.
Though dismayed, Kupta resolves to keep the tradition alive, even if it means having members practice their faith by commuting to London where a fair amount of Londoners practice the ceremony without government sanctions, nor fear of arrest.
In London, Prime Minister David Cameron wholeheatedly endorsed the visiting FABS, and immediately announced a new series of sin taxes with some directed at the ‘bum sniffers.’ According to staffers, an official British license would have to be obtained prior to any organized sniff-in, and a special area will be cordoned off barring minors from participating.
In the British spirit of all encompassing religious tolerance and political correctness, Cameron said he’d attend the first organized ‘sniff-in’ providing he can obtain some kneepads first so in order to…”Not foul my trousers.”