by E. Williams on 17/01/15 at 7:32 am
PARIS – (satireworld.com)
Thousands of Muslims joined in protests today in Paris to show solidarity against the main threat to their existence – cartoon sketch artists. Poverty, crime, and feeling ostracized by their community are all serious problems that face the Muslim community, but no one is more feared than the sinister artists of crudely-sketched depictions of their prophet.
Many in the crowds held signs that read “Hands Up, Don’t Draw” and no signs contained an artist’s rendering of any kind of image. It is common knowledge that Muslims have been afraid of animation and cartoons for years. Family Guy and Beavis & Butthead are forbidden in the Muslim world, and enjoying a Garfield cartoon is subject to punishment by flogging.
The protesters marched through the streets of Paris before ending in one of the many “No Go Zones” throughout the city. The only incident during the march occurred when the protesters walked past an art supply store and several of the more radicalized protesters burst into flames just from being that close to vellum paper and drawing utensils.
At another point in the march, the crowd approached a local cartoonist trying to get to work. As the crowd started shouting and running toward the man to kill him right there in the streets, the man whipped out a sketch pad and a charcoal pencil. He shouted, “Back off, or I’ll sketch something!” At that point, the crowd backed off and slowly went down a different street, leaving the man in peace.
All artists in France have been instructed to stay armed with crayons, a Flair felt tip pen, graphite pencils, and sketch pads and to carry these items on their person when in public until tensions recede in the area.