Sexy Rexy Apoplexy At GOP Moves To Install Big Oil Factotum In The White House

by on 01/12/17 at 8:42 am

Investors across the globe were shocked at today's news concerning big oil's move.

Investors across the globe were shocked at today’s news concerning big oil’s move.

Trump characteristically responds to the 'deep throat'rumor.

Trump characteristically responds to the ‘deep throat’rumor.

Washington DC – (SatireWorld.com)

President Trump is to be removed from orifice and replaced with former ExxonMobil CEO Rex Tillerson, current US Secretary of State, according to a Capitol Hill deep throat briefing today.

The move comes amid reports that the much-vaunted NY Stock Exchange listing of Saudi Aramco is floundering in the wake of a private, foreign US$1 trillion cash offer for 49% of the Saudi crude giant.

“Trump will be dumped,” someone close to House Speaker Paul Ryan told SatireWorld reporters this morning, “we want Sexy Rexy to take over the reins.”

Reports of the ousting have been met with glee in Saudi Arabia where the state oil giant assets sale is planned to fund the kingdom’s lavish space program.

And other important infrastructure stuff.

“We welcome the news of President Tillerson’s upcoming appointment,” House of Saud officials commented as benchmark crude prices rocketed on the announcement.

A statement from the White House is expected later today.



One Response to “Sexy Rexy Apoplexy At GOP Moves To Install Big Oil Factotum In The White House”

  1. Philbert of Macadamia

    Dec 1st, 2017

    In other news, the Clinton Foundation is negotiating to buy all the Sanitary Facilities in the Kingdom for $500 billion.

    Thus leaving the kingdom without a pot to piss in unless Queen Hillary receives a percentage of all the oil money, in what is being called “the Oil for Poop Program!” .

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