“Ram-a Lamb-a Ding Dong” Is New Iranian National Anthem

by on 22/09/18 at 7:38 am

The best a teenager in Iran can hope for is a little pussy......

The best a teenager in Iran can hope for is a little pussy……

Iran's Revolutionary Guards switched to goats ( apparently they don't put up a fuss like sheep), but US forces have a plan for that too....

Iran’s Revolutionary Guards switched to goats ( apparently they don’t put up a fuss like sheep), but US forces have a plan for that too….

Tehran,Iran:

Word from the Middle East today reports that the country of Iran has named a variation of the old Edsel’s doo-wop song as their new national anthem.  “Ram-a Lamb-a Ding Dong,” a modified version of “Rama Lama Ding Dong,” will now be the country’s official song and will be played at the Olympics (should they ever win a medal).  It will also be played in every school each day and children will be required to learn the words.

The best a teenager in Iran can hope for is a little pussy......

The best a teenager in Iran can hope for is a little pussy……

Iran's Revolutionary Guards switched to goats ( apparently they don't put up a fuss like sheep), but US forces have a plan for that too....

Iran’s Revolutionary Guards switched to goats ( apparently they don’t put up a fuss like sheep), but US forces have a plan for that too….

A translation of the lyrics into English reads (remember that rhymes do not always translate):

“Ram-a Lamb-a Lamb-a With Your Ding Dong
Ram-a Lamb-a Lamb-a Lamb-a With Your Ding Dong
Uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-oh-oh”

“Oh oh oh oh
I got a sheep named Ram-a Lamb-a Lamb-a Lamb-a Ding Dong
She’s everything to me
I love to Ram-a the Lamb-a with my Ding Dong
I’ll never set her free
For she’s mine, all mine”

“Oh oh oh oh
I got a sheep named Ram-a Lamb-a Lamb-a Lamb-a Ding Dong
She’s fine to me
Ram-a Lamb-a Lam- with my Ding Dong
You don’t believe that she’s mine, all mine
I love her
Love her, love her so
That I’ll never, never let her go
You may be certain she’s mine, all mine
She’s mine all of the time”

[Chorus]
“Oh I got a girl named Rama Lama Lama Lama Ding Dong
She’s everything to me
Rama Lama Lama Lama Ding Dong
I’ll never set her free
For she’s mine, all mine”

“Oh oh oh oh
I got a sheep named Ram-a Lamb-a Lamb-a Lamb-a Ding Dong
I don’t share her at the Mosque
Ram-a Lamb-a Lam- with my Ding Dong
You don’t believe that she’s mine, all mine
She loves me
Loves me, loves so
That I’ll never, never let her go
Better than a camel, donkey, or a goat
She makes me come all of the time”

[Chorus]

“Bo-bo-bo
Ram-a Lamb-a Ding Dong
Ram-a Lamb-a Ding Ding Dong
Bo-bo-bo”

“Bo-bo-bo
Uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-ah-uh…. AH!”

The phrase “Rama lama ding dong” was first heard in the 1951 song “Who Put the Bomp.”  The Edsels first recorded their number “Rama Lama Ding Dong” in 1957, though it was not a hit until four years later.

Ayatollah Smella Buttholla of the largest mosque in New York City said that “this is a love song to our much loved and respected animals.  It should be played everywhere and all of the time as our expression of freedom and joy.”

When told that The Edsel’s originally wrote the song and still retained copyright, and asked if they had paid any royalties to the group for use of the song, the Ayatollah was insulted.  “Why should we obey and copyright law from The Great Satan?  We do what we want all of the time and don’t ask permission for anything!”

Buttholla’s only regret is that he was unable to participate in the filming of the music video.

At the United Nations, representatives of other Moslem/Muslim nations (Egypt, Syria, Iraq, Pakistan, and Lebanon) all stated that they feel the same way and that this should be considered a regional anthem for the Islamic World.  English Premier League players also believe that the song resonates for them and have demanded that it be played before all of their games.  In the United States, Colin Kaepernick said “I’d stand for that, even though I’m usually on my knees with my friends!”

The song has not been met with universal approval.  MTV and VH-1 have announced that they will not play the music video on their television stations as the images portrayed are not suitable for people of all ages (or anyone that dislikes bestiality and pictures of men humping sheep).  The Society for Prevention of Cruelty to Animals and PETA found the lyrics and music video to be offensive also.  Petting zoos across the civilized world have said that this music will not be permitted in their compounds.

Planned Parenthood has, however, promised to provide free condoms to all people wishing to enjoy the practice.  They will also provide free wipes to help clean up the sheep and lambs (before and after), along with deodorant.  As Iranians never bathe, they won’t need to use the wipes.  The deodorant is for the sheep to get the smell of Iranians off of them.



One Response to ““Ram-a Lamb-a Ding Dong” Is New Iranian National Anthem”

  1. Jalapenoman

    Sep 23rd, 2018

    Has any Middle Eastern country ever sent a sheep to the Miss Universe pageant?

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