Notre Dame Sues NCAA Because One Referee For Football Championship Game Isn’t Catholic

by on 01/01/13 at 10:50 am

The Fighting Irish also like their referees to be Catholic and prize fighters like Referee Shamus McGovern who knocked out an Notre Dame opponent for off-sides

The Fighting Irish like their referees to be Catholic and being an ex-prize fighter helps too like Referee Shamus McGovern who knocked out an Notre Dame opponent for an off-sides violation last fall.

NCAA Headquarters – (SatireWorld.com)

The University of Notre Dame has filed a lawsuit against the NCAA because one of the referees (a line judge) scheduled to work in their National Championship Game isn’t Catholic. The University referred to the unwritten rules that state that the NCAA must do everything it can to see that the Fighting Irish win every game (Note: this same unwritten rule also requires Duke alumni to referee all of that team’s basketball games) and to be ranked in the top twenty five, regardless of how many games the team has lost.

The referee in question, Harrison Algernon of Denver, Colorado, is a Lutheran. Father Michael Limpwrist of Notre Dame said “they hired a Lutheran! A Lutheran? Don’t you remember that Martin Luther started that church because he didn’t like our church? Don’t you know that this is a Protestant Church, and the Protestants are protesting against us? How is this in any way fair if there is a referee in the game that doesn’t go to Confession and Mass before the start of the game? How is it fair to us that our Priest can tell him how the game is to be called?”

In retaliation, the University of Alabama pointed out that none of the referees for the game are Southern Baptists. Their comments, however, were ignored as being racist and prejudicial and seen as trying to gain an unfair advantage.

The NCAA responded to Notre Dame by pointing out that there were currently no line judges available for the game who were practicing Catholics. While there is one lapsed, non-practicing Catholic, he is a former altar boy who is currently involved in a lawsuit against the church for actions by his priest in the past (Notre Dame rejected him as a viable substitute).

The NCAA also pointed out that there were several Mormon officials available to work the game, and that this should please Notre Dame as their star player (Manti Te-o) is a Mormon. Notre Dame rejected this, however, as there is also a Mormon player on the Crimson Tide and they can’t count on a Mormon official to be one-sided.

As a compromise, officials representing the Fighting Irish have suggested that the NCAA bring in the former NFL substitute official who made the touchdown call in the endzone on the last play of the Green Bay-Seattle game earlier this season. “We think he’d do his best to make sure that everything goes our way… like he did when the Seahawks paid him before their game.”



4 Responses to “Notre Dame Sues NCAA Because One Referee For Football Championship Game Isn’t Catholic”

  1. Captain america

    Jan 2nd, 2013

    …I sense another Hail Mary Touchdown Jesus last minute win for the
    mackerel Snappers…after a pass interference call on the safety who was 3 steps behind a wide open tight end who muffs the ball..

    with the Billions paid out to cover for the pedo priests, what’s a few million for ‘saving grace.’

    good one j-man!

    • Bargis

      Jan 2nd, 2013

      J-Man’s the master of football funnies

    • Jalapenoman

      Jan 2nd, 2013

      It looks like Captain America has seen a few Notre Dame football games in the past to remember one of their usual ways of winning!

  2. Captain america

    Jan 3rd, 2013

    …I remember when the Coach used to hand out pig skins to avoid the papal fatwah against condoms…I guess that’s pretty old!

    They used to segregate the band too, especially the rhythm section not to mention the skin flutists…now it’s all ok and they can even matriculate together in the shower like Penn State…

    those green and gold uniforms are still kinda GAY, THOUGH!

    The sisterhood has come a long way, BABY!

    BTW: is ellen degenerate really having Tony Romo’s baby???
    I think there’s a tutorial on their honeymoon called :Fumblerouski!”

    Old tony…still dropping the ball even when there’s a wide open hole!

    Jerry Jones: Privy ro King Tut’s embalming secrets!

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